30 ROCK!

Yesterday we hit the streets of New York to try and see as many sights as we possibly could. We walked the city for 8 hours straight and our feet nearly fell off - but it was worth it!

We started off the day by taking the circle line ferry on the Hudson River from Manhattan to the Statue of Liberty, passing many landmarks along the way including the area where the passenger plane emergency landed on the river and all onboard survived (miracle on the Hudson) and also the area where the Twin Towers once stood. The cruise is a fantastic way to see New York and also New Jersey which is on the opposite side of the Hudson River. The guide was actually a very informative old bloke with a dry New York wit, which made the experience even better. Highly recommend the tour, if nothing else but to get up close to the Statue of Liberty without having to join the throngs of people on the actual island.

Us on the Hudson River, NYC in the background!

The building being constructed in the middle is One World Trade Centre (formerly Freedom Tower),
being built to replace the fallen Twin Towers.

Lady Liberty

Once we hopped off the circle line we decided to hop on the subway, go down to World Trade Centre and then wind our way back up to midtown by foot, walking to different destinations on the way. Clearly looking confused and foreign, a young guy asked us if we needed help with where we were going. He was a nice guy, studying ballet at the nearby University and gave us tips on how the subway worked and places we should visit. He even went so far as to walk us off the subway, to the main strip in Chelsey. Then he turned around, wished us well on our trip and headed back to where he was originally going. We also had two other people give us some handy tips on the subway, one lady telling us to "make sure you drink plenty of water" and another guy (apparently off TV but we didn't recognise him) telling us to go to the Empire State Building at night rather than day as the crowds are ridiculous. I always got the impression that New Yorkers were stiff, unfriendly types of people that ignore each other let alone tourists but that's certainly not what we've experienced.

Anyway, despite the young guy's best intentions, we actually got off at the wrong spot (I think he was intent on introducing us to the Chelsea area which is the gay area of NY). So we hopped back on the subway and headed to the World Trade Centre.

Subway takes you right to World Trade Centre

Visiting the World Trade Centre area (ground zero) is a very humbling experience. It was already very difficult to fathom what happened there, but to see the construction area, hear people talk about their experiences of 9/11 at the tourist information centre and who and how many died - was a very sobering experience. Even on the cruise we were on in the morning, we couldn't help but see that NY looked like it was missing something without the two towers, so how hard it must be then for the locals.

But, construction of One World Trade Centre is powering along, they are at the half way point now and the building will become the tallest building in America. The designs for it, the memorial areas and the 7-8 other buildings being built around it are stunning. At the moment the buildings at the site are very grey and traditional. The tower and the other buildings will completely stand out from this and will make the NY skyline very modern and unique.

One World Trade Centre (formerly Freedom Tower) currently half built.

For more information about the rebuild and designs you can CLICK HERE. It's actually very interesting to see what they are doing. Terry and I have promised that we'll come back again to NY one day once World Trade Centre has been rebuilt.

From WTC we slowly started to wind our way back uptown, trying to stop off at some places we'd marked off on our to-do list. We have a pocket map of Manhattan to work off, but unfortunately it doesn't contain street numbers on it, so finding the exact location of some of the things we wanted proved to be very difficult - so we missed a few! But here's some of the ones we did find:

* Bouley restaurant - this one was a surprise for Tez. I'd read in a magazine that Cyndi Lauper's favourite restaurant in NY was a french restaurant called Bouley. This is him standing out the front! We we're hoping to be able to stop in for lunch, but it was closed. We also learnt later that it's very tres chic and we'd probably have buckley's of getting a table. We considered calling up and name dropping her name, but the results could be disastrous!

"I walked all daaaay, to get to you... is that alright? "

Next stop off was a NY fire brigade station. Why? Because it's the headquarters of the Ghostbusters!!

Who ya gonna call?

GHOSTBUSTERS!

From there we has some misses looking for other spots on our list - the original soup Nazi (from Seinfeld), the restaurant from Seinfeld where the gang usually hang out, the Daily Planet, some cool comic shops etc. BUT we won't be beaten and this morning we are going to google map everything to the exact location and make sure we tick these off our list.

After 7 hours of walking we headed back to our apartment to take 5 and get ready for the Alicia Keys concert! Heading down in the elevator, dressed up and raring to go, Tez realised from the tickets that the concert wasn't actually until THURSDAY night. Ooops! Lucky we checked before getting into a cab and heading for uptown to the Beacon Theatre!

Given that we now had a clear night ahead, we decided to have dinner at a French restaurant just up the road from us called Chez Josephine. From the website it looked very very quirky,  a lot of fun and then menu sounded delish. We weren't disappointed - the owner, Jean-Claude Baker was a kooky French guy and was a great host, very happy to have two guys from Sydney, Australia dining at his restaurant, and the restaurant itself was a really kitsch French scene. Loved the piano and the live crooning.

The food was fantastic. I had a lobster bisque to start (divine) and Tez decided to have crab cakes, which were similarly as nice. Good to have tried crab cakes actually as it seems like one of those staple foods that Americans like and we'd never tried one. Then for mains I had a lobster cassoulet which had shrimp (prawns), lobster, scallops and a homemade seafood sausage. Was lush! And Terry had a fillet Mignon with pommes frits (french fries) which he was extremely happy with. Despite being as full as bulls, we couldn't go past the creme brulee (me) and the Josephine chocolate delight (Tez). Tres bloody bein indeed!

Just desserts ...

By that time we were both about to explode so decided to leave our French friends and go for a stroll. Both Terry's brother and the apparent celeb guy on the subway both gave us the same tip - if you're going to go up the Empire State Building, wait until about 11pm and then go up. It's bedlam during the day and you're going to line up for hours and be packed in like sardines. So we headed to the Empire State and sure enough, going up in the lift you can see room after room and level after level of cordoned off areas ready for people to line up. On a busy Saturday day you could expect to line up here for literally hours and hours!!

So we lined up for about 2 minutes and were warned that the view at that point wasn't the best due to cloud. In fact, lots of people in front of us bought tickets and then decided to come back another time (tickets valid for 14 days) because of the obstructed view. We decided to go ahead and go up because we knew we'd be busy tonight and on Thursday night. I was also not convinced that it was that cloudy. We're both really glad we went up - the cloud (I call it fog more than cloud) made the experience even more special and the photos we took (we think) look better for the fact that the fog's there.

View of the Empire State Building from the ground up.

View of Times Square from the Empire State Building

View of the top of the Empire State Building from the Observation Deck.

Tez takes on King Kong!

Today we head out as mentioned to tick a few more spots of our list. We'll also visit Central Park, try to find the Korilla food truck, visit Rockefeller Plaza, home of Liz Lemon and 30 Rock and perhaps take the tour and go up to the Rockefeller Observation Deck to see the NY skyline in the daytime.

Expecting more sore feet by the end of the day!

MB

Metropolis: The Big Apple

New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There's nothing you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Hear it for New York, New York, New York!

View of the city from the plane.

That tune (Alicia Keys - Empire State of Mind II) hasn't stopped running through my head since we stepped off the plane at JFK Airport late yesterday afternoon. Standing in Times Square 1 hour later and having it blare down at us at full volume gave the song even more meaning as we stood under the bright lights in the big city and it hit home that we were in New York, the big apple, Metropolis!

Times Square (Tez in green shirt on sidewalk)

New York is fantastic. It's as busy as hell, which is very apt given that we are staying right next to the infamous Hell's Kitchen. After settling into our stunning 'crib' (took us a while to work out the front door - magnetic keys? where are the instructions!) on West 42nd Street - an upgrade from our originally booked Wall Street apartment (flooded) we hit the streets to explore New York for a few hours. Stopping in at a few bars I had my first US beer (hey, I've been drinking a lot of cocktails!) and have to say that I really like American lite beer - it's not lite in terms of alcohol like in Australia, but is less fizzy and doesn't get you bloated. Really easy to drink. So bar hopping it through Hell's Kitchen we stopped it in at a local gay bar which had three young female singers belting out Mariah Carey, Cyndi Lauper and Whitney Houston songs - heaven! They actually had superb voices - not a miming drag queen in sight.

Last stop of the night was a smokey jazz club - a stop that was dictated by the fact that we needed to use the toilet more than wanting to visit the actual club. But what a find. Guy on piano, about 5 other people in the bar and they were all taking turns getting up and singing tunes. It was very cool to sit back and watch these guys take turns singing their favourite songs. Not karaoke. These guys could actually sing! It was a great way to finish off our first few hours in New York and made it feel like we were really experiencing the city.

Crooning at the jazz bar. We didn't know all the tunes, but that really didn't matter.

Stumbling home with a few beers under the belt I had to try one of the infamous New York pizzas. It's only basically a Margarita pizza, but it was sooooo good!! (We've actually been eating really well, I think because of the time difference and the size of the meals we're basically having 2 meals a day and sometimes haven't bothered with dinner. Thought we'd be eating HEAPS of junk food but have been keeping it healthy, aside from this drunken pizza slice of course!).

Pizza. Good. Enough said.

Today we're going to explore New York some more, make some visits to famous spots in the city from the movies (The Daily Planet, diner from Seinfeld and from When Harry Met Sally etc) then maybe hop on a ferry past lady liberty and through to Staten Island, pay respects at Ground Zero, stroll through Central Park... the list goes on.

Tonight we have tickets to see Alicia Keys live in concert - just her, a piano and us smack bang in the middle of row 2. SO SO looking forward to it! I'll have Empire State of Mind II running through my head for the rest of the trip I'm sure.

A local also told us that Beyonce is doing a free concert this Friday morningfor the morning show. Given our luck with morning show concerts (Cyndi) we might have to check that out too. Nothing like a free concert!

MB

OK, OK, shall give you a FEW saucy details of our time in Vegas.... :)

Another early morning, another early flight, but with the orginal city of sin (tm), you hit the ground running!
We arrive feeling a bit hesitant, excited, concerned, jubilant all rolled in one.


But as we arrive to our hotel, with slot machines the very first thing you see as you walk in the door, and people boozing and smoking (inside!) at 11:00am, we knew we would feel at home.... :)

.

Walking down the street, hundreds of people spew out on to the footpath, and some even literally ON to the footpath. We were not in Kansas anymore..... or indeed LA...!
Vegas, at first sight, was cheap, seedy, debaucherous, trashy and sweaty (a little like us perhaps...! You would have thought we would have fit in!) But seedy drunken jock yobbos, still out from the night before, shirtless, with a massive cheesy Vegas plastic yard glass and straw hanging from their burnt lips, sitting right next to that Dunhill Blue. Hmmmm, time for a drink methinks!
After sampling my first Slot Machine (a 'Flying High' themed one at that! (surely you can't be serious...), we trek through the 40 degree heat (and 10 degree heat in the casinos, although a 40 foot statue of a naked man seemed to heat Bondy up somewhat.....)

Lunch was debaucherous, sampling some of the Clam Chowder and deciding to save our next sampling for Boston. A bit of a Nanna Nap, and it was time for *insertdramaticmusichere*
CELINE DION, live at the Colloseum at Caesar's Palace!


And despite the cheesy 50 ft poster (see above), she was pure class. One of the best voices in the business. She did not disappoint.
After a bit more gambling, we decide to head back to the hotel...... for a bit more gambling! After an initial win, we seem to lose momentum, but after finding a Pokie machine based on the movie 'Alien' we didn't care and smiled geekily as it stole more and more money from us. Money well spent methinks...

So, Vegas, you dirty, seedy, slutty Hustler.

But, really, what more were we to expect....????

TW

The Orginal Sin City......VEGAS!

What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas....... [end blog]

;)

Tinsel Town

Sorry about the lag in updates on the blog but travelling around and doing stuff makes it hard to catch up!

Friday - Hollywood: From our hotel in WeHo we walked along Sunset Drive towards Hollywood to check out the designer stores and famous spots along the way. We passed by the Chateau Marmont Hotel, which is famous for it's celebrity guests (I knew Lyndsay Lohan wasn't too far away!!), the Comedy Store which has seen many famous comedians do stand up (Richard Pryor, Robin Williams, Seinfeld etc), the actual headquarters of National Lampoon (!) - "look kids! National Lampoon",

Mark outside the Chateau Marmont Hotel

Terry outside the National Lampoon's Headquarters

Eventually we reached the hallowed ground that is Hollywood! First stop was the Hollywood Museum which contained movie memorabilia and costumes from Hollywood movies, ranging from Elvis and Marlyn Munroe movies (of which neither of us have actually seen any!) to Star Wars and Superman. But the absolute highlight was visiting Hannibal Lectre's dungeon cell from one of my favourite movies of all time - The Silence of the Lambs. They did an incredible job of recreating the scene at the mental hospital and had actual props from the movies - Hannibal's drawings, his suit, the face mask etc. Was really quite awesome and was my Graceland moment (is that weird?).

The hallway leading to Lecter's cell. Chair left out for Clarice Starling. Awesome!

 

Lecter's cell. Very cool.

From there it was a short work to the world famous Gruman's Chinese Theatre where celebs sign their names in cement and either leave their hand or foot prints. This is also where the famous Hollywood Walk of Fame is and the Hollywood stars.

Grauman's Chinese Theatre

R2D2 and C3PO's footprints! :)

Outside the Grauman's Chinese Theatre are also people dressed up as movie stars. It seems like they are there to add some pizzaz and make a tourists experience more pleasing. Unfortunately they are husslers. Below looks like I'm having fun posing with two pirates from the Pirates of The Carribean movie (at least that's what he said he was, but it's pretty clear he's Zorro = crack head) but underneath that smile you can see on my face is the sinking realisation that I'm being hussled. The guy jokes around with you, he chats about Australia and loving Aussies, he's only too happy to pose for a photo with you, yada yada. Then when your travelling companion is lining you up for the photo with the camera, the guy holds his hand up in front of you and in the palm of his hand (holding it facing you and so no one can see on the other side) there's a $20 bill and he whispers "hey man, I don't do this stuff for free right? I work for tips. See? $20". Way to go buddy! Great for tourism. $20 tip?? You've got to be kidding! Your costume sucks big time! I give him a few buck notes (to avoid being stabbed or mobbed later) and peel away from them asap once the photo's taken. Ironically though they are dressed up acting as pirates, they actually are pirates. End visit to Guarman's Theatre.

I wish the knife I was holding was real and not plastic.

Sigourney Weaver's star - "Get away from her you bitch!"

From there we decided to join one of the shuttle tours of movie star's homes. Unfortunately, this was a bit of a rort too. Don't get me wrong, you do see some homes and famous hotels etc, but the majority of major movie stars live so far away from an accessible road that half the time you just get the "... if you look into the distance there you can see an American flag and two chimneys? That's Tom and Katie's house! I see them driving around quite often and only yesterday Katie passed by our shuttle and waved at as". Repeat celebrity spotting stories on a half hourly basis - we saw nobody.

Granted I'm sure that celebrities are spotted from time to time, but harping on about it makes you feel as though you've missed out on something and ruins the experience a little. Having said that we did get to see quite a bit of Hollywood, WeHo and Beverly Hills that we wouldn't have seen due to not having a car. Some interesting things included the store from Pretty Woman where Julia Roberts is ignored, the Hollywood Sign (originally HOLLYWOOD LAND - put up by real estate people to try and sell land, the 'land' part feel down due to a landslide so it became 'Hollywood' and was kept that way to symbolise the area), the street where they filmed Halloween and Nightmare on Elm Street (a buzz for us anyway!), the Laugh Factory where Michael Richards (Kramer) had his recent standup act which ended up in a racist rant, the house where Michael Jackson died, the Osbourne's house (now owned by Christina Aguilera) and the mansion that is Xavier's School for the Gifter from the X Men movies.

The Hollywood Sign. Can you see it? It's just under that massive antenna? I think.

90210.

The tour was $30 each and it lasted for about 2.5 hours which was suprising. It was about 7pm when we got back to the hotel and we decided to head down to a local Japanese for our first taste of LA sushi. The food was awesome and fresh - we got agedashi tofu (was nice!), 'shrimp' gyoza and a plate of sushi each. They have albacore here, we had no idea what that was, but the waitress explained it was a white tuna. Was nice! Alas, no photos as we forgot the camera :( Will do better next time.

Next up: Vegas!!!

MB

Touristical and PROUD!

Alrighty then, after finally receiving our duty free contraband from our "child star" taxi driver (only in LA) we decided to celebrate with a few cocktails by the rooftop pool. Oh yeah, holiday mode has well and truly kicked in.

Time to get some touristy action going on - the Univeral Studios Tour! VIP of course. (btw, if this blog is not as witty/interesting/innane as usual it is because I accidentally deleted the witty/interesting/innane blog i had written and so, might not be as witty/inte......uh, i digress. ) Time for more innane ramblings methinks.

VIP = Very Important Pretentiousness!

The VIP tour is expensive, but definitely worth paying for. You get a buffet all you can eat lunch, have a private tour guide, don't have to line up for any rides or shows and you get to get off the tram at certain stops to look around. A much better deal that the usual plebs who, for example, have to line up for 55 minutes to ride the Simpsons ride while we lined up for 5.5 minutes. SUCKERS!

After having an introduction by our tour guide ('Aurora') and free fruit salad and small-lidded water (smaller sized bottle lid to help save the environment - so LA), we moved on to our first adventure. The Haunted House!!!!

Much like it's name, the Haunted House is a walk-thru experience where they have horror scenes, but they have live actors dressed in costumes that jump out at you when you least expect it. A little p*ssweak, that is until a certain little Frankenstein Red herring'ed me and i left my own little tip of three copper pennies. At least, I hope they were copper.... ** 1/2 stars. An extra half star for all the small children who balled their eyes out and had to be ejected from the walk thru! :)

Time for a quick water refreshment before we move on, now, where did I put those pennies.....
OK, enough about that, let's, move on to the main attraction. The Studio Tour.

Us outside what was the Clock Tower from Back to the Future - great scott!

The tour basically consists of being loaded on to a tram and driven around the backlot of Universal Studios where they tour the actual studios where they film TV shows (such as Parenthood, Desperate Housewives, Weeds etc). You also get to visit the scenes of various famous movies (some scenes used for a number of different movies, they just change the colour of the building and the signs etc).

Our photo siting of King Kong! Blurred for authenticity of course!

The King Kong ride in 3D was brilliant! **** stars from me. You're driven into a dark tunnel and the entire wall on the left and on the right of the tunnel are movie screens where King Kong battles out dinousaurs and your tram accidentally gets involved! King Kong jumps around the cart and you're picked up and dropped off cliffs etc. It's in 3D which makes it extra realistic and they also spray water at you at various times which is very cool.

The Jaws Amity Island section was awesome, complete with shark attack, bloody water and Bruce himself (name of the mechanical shark in the movie) coming up close to say hello. Iconic! ****

Screek! Screek! Screek!

Great to visit the actual Psycho house and Bates Motel from the famous Hitchock classic. Nice touch to have Norman come out and chase after the cart with a giant knife!

ET throne home ... ?

Another stop and this time to view the prop warehouse at the studio. A massive 2 level warehouse with literally millions of props used in Universal movies. Each prop has an individual barcode on it which links to a database for registering and searching - amazing! We saw some cool props from different movies, such as the some of the dinosaur eggs and dinosaur prints from Jurrasic Park, armour and crowns used in Robin Hood, the guitar from Scott Pilgrim VS the World, arsenal from Battle Star Galactica, thrones from Gladiator and so much more.

The tour moves on and we to drive down Wisteria Lane without a bizarre plot twist in sight! Must be off season. Interesting that they've used the same neighbourhood for decades - the houses were used in Tom Hank's awful movie The Burbs, then repainted for Desperate Housewives. Similarly in the city that was used for Spartacus, Pirates of the Carribean and other movies, the buildings were recently repainted and facades updated for the upcoming Captain America movie.

From here we're taken to the crash scene which Steven Spielburg designed from War of the Worlds, costing million of dollars and which has an actual plane that was destroyed just for the movie. All on the aptly named Steven Spielburg Drive of course.

Next stop a scene from the movie Earthquake in an underground subway station. Earthquake hits, roof caves in, oil tanker from the road crashes through and the set explodes in fire. Subway train comes through and crashes into your tram, more explosions and electricity strikes and then out of nowhere a flood comes down the stairs and makes it up to your tram before disappearing. Just another day at Wynyard Station! Was pretty darn cool.

We the hopped off the tram and visited the foley studios which is the OFFICIAL sound stage where they make the sounds which they add to TV shows and movies. Because they film without recording sound, then add the sound effects later, such as people walking, whistling or uncomfortably scratching their ass. Did you know that walking UP stairs has a different sound to walking DOWN stairs?!?!?! Who knew?!

We also got to see the Delorean (the car from Back to the Future - ***** stars out of principle!) and we saw lots of big drunken Homer Simpsons types, going on 19 years of age that DON'T live in New Hampshire. Hang on, that's NEXT week... (we got a photo at the Kwik-e-mart just for you bro!).

No birds on this statue... Alfred Hitchcock

Next stop, VIP reserved seating at the Waterworld Theme Attraction. Yes, not many other people saw the movie either, but probably why it is still trying to recoup costs (which is actually an underrated movie). It's a show featuring actors in a massive Waterworld set with explosions, lots of guns and fight scenes and a seaplane that crashes right in front of you. Bad acting, but impressive stunts - **** from me.

Next was the BIG shows. Terminator 2 - 3D.  Featuring the real cast - Arnie, (The Governator), Edward Furlong, (out of drug mode) and Linda Hamilton (overacting) - it was actually very cool. Filmed a couple of years after T2, its a mixture of a live action show (featuring look-a-like actors that blends with 3D film of the original stars acting out a new plotline after T2). Despite it coming out a while ago, the 3D was awesome and must have been groundbreaking when it was realised. The show was directed by James Cameron and apparently this was what he cut his teeth on for Avatar's 3D. Very cool things include your seat moving at key moments during the show and water spraying at you from the ceiling - which is a bit of a shock. **** stars from us.

Next Shrek 4D! We were a bit apprehensive because we thought it would be totally for kids and be a bit lame, but it was actually quite cool, well, much better than that Shrek 3 which they decided to milk! Again a new plot line, after the first movie, featuring all the original stars. It was funny, the 3D was fantastic plus more of the seats moving, water spraying effect (at least I hope it was the ride), which all adds to the experience!

The Mummy's Revenge ride - another one we were apprehensive about because the movies were only so so. OARSUM ride, so OARSUM that I had to put it it capital letters. It's a rollercoaster ride that takes you through underground tombs - only thing is that it's dark, you get shunted around violently, drop without being able to see where the fall ends, your direction changes and you ride backwards and corpses and mummy's fly at you from the darkness. Much scarier than what was expected! Many pennies were spent.... ;) ****1/2

One more ride left left for the day! (BTW we arrived at 10am and it was now almost 7pm!! A full day of fun and you are constantly on the go!).

Da da da da da daaa da da dadada..... The Simpsons Ride! 55 minutes waiting time in line for the ride. Not for us Mad Men with VIP access! SUCKERS! Again, being the Simpsons and designed for kids, we thought it would just be cutesy, but being Simpsons fans we had to give it a go. What a brilliant ride it was. It's not a moving rollercoaster, but you're sat in a car and loaded into room that's basically a movie screen all around you. The screen then takes you on a rollercoaster adventure through a very cool Simpsons plot line and the car mechanically moves to what happens on the screen. Given that you're not restricted by a physical track, the movie and the mechanical cart can take you anywhere, from running off the rollercoaster track on screen to flying through the air and into giant Maggie's mouth to be used as a pacifier (complete with baby powder smell in the air!). It was the best ride out of all them and is the future of roller coastering. Gone will be the massive rollercoasters built in theme parks. So much so that Universal are demolishing two of their older rides and building a Transformers ride which is similar to this Simpsons ride, but is the next level combining a moving mechanical cart and on screen film. Brilliant ***** from both Margaret ,,, I mean, Mark and I.

After a very long day and extremely sore feet we decided to chillax on Santa Monica Boulevard with a few more drinks and reflect on what was an awesome day.

JR (& MB)

Insert unnerving Jaws movie music

Roof top garden and pool at our hotel.

It finally dawned on me yesterday that we were overseas, in LA and on holiday after two things happened. 1) I was lying by the pool on a weekday being served cocktails 2) being asked by locals if I was from New Zealand (COME ON!).

When we arrived yesterday we were disappointingly greeted by a very cloudy, foggy day and my dreams of lying by the pool getting an LA tan were being flushed down the 'john'. Thankfully our rather over chatty cab driver explained that we were experiencing what is called the 'June Gloom' where the fog from the nearby ocean travels into the city in the mornings, but burns away by lunch time. Sure enough, by about 11am the fog had gone and the day turned into the glorious sunny LA day that I'd always seen in the movies.

So we took full advantage of LA's rays and headed up to the hotel's roof to have a swim in the pool, lie on deck chairs and sip some cocktails. As I lay on the deck chair slurping my Garden Mary (like a Bloody Mary but with smashed olives and you get it served to you in the garden, which is basically what the roof top pool area is called = clever!) I looked at the LA skyline and the Hollywood Hills, and realised that I was now truly on holiday - I can tell you that a Garden Mary never tasted so bloody good (especially since I'd never had one before)!

After tanning it up, we decided to head down Melrose Avenue to check out the local scene and to see what shops were about. Out of pure coincidence I'd managed to book a hotel that was smack bang next to the gay area in West Hollywood (or WeHo as us locals call it). We dropped into the local supermarket and were completely gob smacked by the sheer variety of products available - a whole isle dedicated to ice cream alone! Plus, and how cool is this (pun intended), they sell dog ice creams!

Terry though, was much more excited by seeing bananas at 77c a pound.

"77c a pound! That's crazy!" exclaims Terry.

After our quick stop shop, we decided that must stop in at a few local bars/restaurants to take advantage of their Happy Hour (which ironically goes from 4pm to 8pm - a long hour!) and meet the local yocals.

Happy Hour is obviously a competitive marketing strategy for all the local bars to try and get your business. All the bars offer special deals such as 2 for 1 drinks; bottomless mimosas and bloody mary's for $9.95; all you can eat tacos for $5 (includes rice and beans); All you can eat burgers for $1; burritos for 49c - and other such ludicrously cheap, excessive deals.

Being two guys that truly appreciate ludicrously cheap, excessive deals, we decided to go for the 2 for 1 drinks which seemed quite economical. But in our youthful naivety, rather than buy just 2 drinks for the price of 1 and have a drink each, we each bought ourselves 2 drinks and didn't share them (!). I went for cocktails and was quite surprised by how much alcohol they put in their drinks. I was certain that they'd water them down, but these bad boys were strong and so too were the cocktails we had on our hotel roof - these guys know how to pour!

'2 for 1' sounded like fun.

This visit to Fiesta Cantina, for that is what the place was called, also marked our first taste of LA Mexican food and I'm happy to say that it was damn good - Ole! We ordered a 3 dip deal where you get 4 dips (these crazy Americans!!) guacamole, black bean, something cheesey and rich, and a cilitrano salsa. Cilitrano? That's what they call coriander here in the states. There you go, you learn something new and useful everyday. All dips were very yummy and their corn chips absolutely rock!

With a stomach full of good mexican food and feeling tipsy and high off strong cocktails, we decided to go back to our hotel room for a few more drinks courtesy of our previously lost, now relocated and delivered duty free purchases, update our blog and excitedly plan out other activities for Mark & Tez's Most Excellent US Adventure (TM). Having said that, I basically passed out on the bed and did none of the above. BUT given that I hadn't slept for more than 24 hours, I think in this instance, sleep was well deserved.

Plus we are also off to Universal Studios today (yaaay!) to catch up with Jaws, visit Anthony Perkins (and his mother) at the Psycho House and offer one of Terry's prized 77c a pound bananas to King Kong on his awesome new 360 degree 3D ride.

Photos and review to come!

MB

La La Land La Vida Loca...

Well, we made it. We left in a big puff of smoke, quite literally, and set off, like so many Home & Away & Neighbours starlets & himbos before us, to La La Land, where the city can either make you (hello Chris Hemsworth) or break you (hello the rest of you....)

The plane trip was somewhere in between excruciatingly awful, and....... pleasant. Things looked up, us realising that we had a spare seat next to us. Bliss, we thought, but upon closer viewings of the luxury Business Class seats ahead of us, we quickly realised that we were still in cattle class. Well, at least we weren't heading to Indonesia.....! ;) http://www.banliveexports.org.au/

My nightmariest of nightmares subsided as soon as I saw the entertainment unit in the back of the seat, with movies/music/tv goodies galore!!! But when would I find time to eat/sleep/constantly press the stewards button for free peanuts/kick the old guys seat ahead of me?!?!?!? I don't know how, but somehow I managed to fit in all of those habituals...

Food was average, although I believe Marky Mark, upon ordering Vegetarian, didn't quite expect to be fed stuff that looked like it would only be served to vegetables! Broiled veges and rice, and then the same on a roll does not constitute a meal!

We arrived a little tired, and definitely somewhat hungry, so we set forth for West Hollywood! A nice ol' taxi driver/tour guide took us to our hotel. He claimed to have been an old child movie star. Yeah,
right, do we look like we came down in the last flight from Sydney?!?!?!? After listening excitedly of his stories, we get to the hotel, a quaint little place, with a quaint little name, just the right place for quaint young people like Bondy & myself -  Petit Ermitage

Very tres bien abode indeed, as we wallowed in its pretentiousness, that was until, the 'child star' cabbie took off with our Duty Free! The Porters forgot to take it out!!! Forget the luggage, forget the passports, but DON'T LEAVE THE FRICKIN DUTY FREE!!!! Anyways, with pulses racing, we managed to get it sorted and he is dropping it off a bit later. Let's hope these actor/taxi drivers in LA have some kind of morals.... hmmmm.....

But, firt things first. After a quick shower to wash off the smell of cattle class, we start our trek for 'real food'. Finding many interesting places, we stumble across an old fashioned drive in diner. POIFEKT we think! Burgers all round! Mel's Diner, with old school jukeboxes, massive burgers, lip-injected botoxed waitresses and signed pictures of Richie Cunnigham all over the walls, this was what LA is all about!

After trolling the streets a bit more, we decide the hotels rooftop pool is the way to go, but before that, we stumble across an iconic haunt, The Viper Room!

Be seeing you later oh death footpath of River Phoenix!!!!! How dare you rob us of the star of My Own Private Idaho, The Mosquito Coast and Sneakers (all of which I presume you have seen, thrice)

Anyways, time to go sunbathe in speedos and get that healthy copper tan of the local Los Angelites, and to see whether this cabbie rocks up with our bag of contraband! Will he, or won't he? Stay tuned mesmerized viewers and those who mistakenly stumbled on our blog page and currently hitting the back button repeatedly like a video game from the 90s....

The answer will be in the next 'tantalizing episode' of "Tez & Mark's Most Excellent US Adventure (TM)"...!

JR

This is the Headlines...

Well, today's Headlines were something to behold....or to start a bonfire with......
Nothing like a bit of positivity to come with this bitter southerly!

"Qantas has announced it will run no flights in and out of Sydney, Canberra and Melbourne tomorrow.  Jetstar  has axed all of tomorrow's flights. A larger ash cloud from the Chilean volcano could disrupt travel at Australia's major airports for two days, affecting hundreds of thousands of passengers."

Alas, talking to our airline, Delta (which I believe, like its namesake, was 'Born To Try') is still scheduled to fly (bless its rusty socks...) Maybe its the stubborn hard-as-nails Walkinshaw mentality, or perhaps the ignorant belligerence that comes with a few glasses of pinot, but am POSITIVE we shall be flying off into that ashy sunrise at 10:05 tomorrow morning, if only to be on time for our VIP Universal Studios Tour or indeed for the free backseat movies and free booze. Bless Delta for risking our safety for the promise of a look at the amphibian accordion which was the original Jaws themepark ride, and cheap free scotch. Smile you son of a bitch indeed...

Universal Studios VIP Tour



So, here we are, too early to go to bed (it will be 5:00pm LA time when we get on the plane), too sober to stay up all night. Tough decisions all round methinks. Maybe going and watching some infomercials will help me make up my mind. Either that, or I will end up with a 3rd Ab King Pro.


Each to their own I say, but we shall be updating you at varying hours, and varying levels of sobriety, whether you care or not, to give you the LATEST of ......"Tez and Mark's Most Excellent US Adventure"!!!! (aka Tezzy & Marky's National Lampoon's Gay Vacation....) :)

All I know it is going to be a helluva lotta fun....

So for now, adieu, to yieu and yieu.......

TW

Me Love You Long Time

Given that today is the day before our much anticipated flight to the US (much anticipated as such that Tez has made enquiries to ensure we have entertainment units on the back of the seats and has already accessed what movies will be shown on the flight) we decided we'd 'jump on it' and book ourselves into a nice thai message - to relax and settle us in to the next few grueling weeks of shopping, drinking, eating and all round slothishness.

Shameless plug or sharing the love? Terry found an excellent deal on discount whoring website "Jump On It" for a thai massage place called Thai Remedy in Balmain. For only $49 we're getting:

60-minute Thai remedy massage package 

Skin nourishing hot oil treatment

Herbal massage to soothe muscle tension and stiffness

Promotion of generally good health by dissolving accumulated toxins and stress

Relieves fatigue, aches and pain in the body

Increased circulation and improved energy and mental alertness

How good is that?! Don't worry, we've actually been to this place before and they are a legitimate massaging business with no "you hit jackpot?'"whispering at the end of the 60mns ... if you know what I mean ... The first time we went I got confused and thought the massage place was called 'Jump On It', which raised an eyebrow I can tell you. If you're interested in booking CLICK HERE.

Anyway, once that's done we'll pack the dogs into the car along with all our luggage and head to Ma & Pa's Bond's house where the dogs will be holidaying while we are away. A special thank you to Ms Jaci 'Onassis' Wainwright too for housesitting for us and looking after the cats (yes that's right there will be someone at our house at all times, for those considering a shifty burglary. Yes, she carries a gun).

MB